Problem: You've cracked the meaning of life, but now your laptop’s drained. Giant power adaptors block all free outlet spots. If you leave anything unplugged, the universe may implode.
Solution: Arm yourself against the unchecked proliferation of supersized power adaptors. Coleman’s Power Strip Liberator to the rescue! Available at Amazon.com.
Problem: ‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, the only creature stirring is you, cursing and stomping at 1am because parts are missing from your kid's new Big Wheel.
Solution: Open the box in the store parking lot. Procure any wayward parts before leaving and save yourself the hassle of yet another trip to Toys R Us.
Problem: You're in a quaint bistro. Flowers adorn a charming little table piled with plates, glasses, silverware, salt, pepper, wine, etc. One false move means disaster—the table is WOBBLY!
Solution: First, place folded Primitive Spark Usability Violation post-it notes under table leg until stability is achieved. Next, leave a note for the staff informing them of their terribly tippy table.
Problem: You've got one remote for the TV, one for TiVo and another for the sound system. On the off chance there's something good to watch, you’ll need to push 35 buttons to get to it.
Solution: Bake some cookies. Use them to bribe an 8-year-old into programming a universal remote for you. Not a baker? No TV for you! Go for a walk.
Problem: You're exhausted and infuriated. Your fingers are shredded to bits. Diabolical plastic packaging has once again made it impossible to get at that essential item you MUST have.
Solution: Worldwide elimination of devilish packaging that causes bodily injury, mental anguish, and requires professional tools. In the meantime, may we suggest: leatherman.com.
Problem: A left turn sign with more rules and exceptions than an iTunes contract: "NO LEFT TURN M-F 7AM-9AM AND 4PM-6PM SAT 3PM-7PM SUN 4PM-8PM EXCEPT HOLIDAYS."
Solution: Install flexible electronic ink displays showing current rules only. A much better use of your tax dollars than the now-extinct automatic cameras. RIP red light photo shoots.
Problem: Your fine holiday edibles say "Best before December 24th." Uh oh.
Solution: For top tier guests, check the labels and chuck or donate the goods. Be sure to serve the less-than-fresh to only your most tiresome visitors.
Problem: People attired all in black while stealth-walking their dogs after dark: They're invisible to drivers and cause unthinkable accidents.
Solution: If you’re not a jewel thief, an Italian widow, an artist or Batman, wear lighter clothing. Otherwise, try an illuminated dog leash or LED arm band.
Problem: "Your kid's cool new toy needs batteries, NOT INCLUDED. You’re out of AAs. Holiday guests are descending, nearby stores are closed and the closest "inconvenience” store is miles away."
Solution: Steal from the TV remote, but don’t tell the family football fans. Future plan: Get rechargeables. They retain their juice for eons, cost less and will spare you trips to Meltdownsville.
Problem: Your wide-eyed tots corner you, demanding to know why Santa's not coming down the chimney on Christmas Eve to personally deliver their presents. What do you say?
Solution: Santa’s gone digital: eWishlists, on-demand fulfillment, distributed shipping, and an app that checks his list twice. His elfBots track Facebook status, so he knows who’s naughty or nice.
You've cracked the meaning of life, but now your laptop’s drained. Giant power adaptors block all free outlet spots. If you leave anything unplugged, the universe may implode.
Arm yourself against the unchecked proliferation of supersized power adaptors. Coleman’s Power Strip Liberator to the rescue! Available at Amazon.com.